Around this time last year, I found myself in Tulum, in circle with a group of wonderful sisters. On this particular day of the retreat, we were doing hot seats. Everyone got a dedicated 20 minutes to share and get feedback on a challenge in their life.
Being that this was a mastermind-style setting, my mind directly went to the laundry list of challenges in my business.
Did I want to talk about my challenge with marketing? Best financial practices? The difficult conversation I need to have with someone on my team?
As we went around the circle, I wondered which would be the most valuable topic to talk about.
And then it was my time.
Out of my mouth came… “So… My desire is to become a channel of divine, unconditional love.”
What.
The.
Actual.
Fuck.
That wasn’t on my laundry list…
I thought I was going to solve a practical business problem today.
The moment I said it, I could hear my mind and my ego already judging me and screaming at me for wasting the most precious 20 minutes of this retreat that I invested in to talk about “Being Love” (cue mocking tone).
Can’t I just figure that one out myself?
Also, what sort of concrete feedback are these women going to share with me on THAT!?!?
What I had no idea at the time was that this statement would propel me on a journey of going deep to:
🖤 Finding all the places where I was still loving conditionally
🖤 All the places where I needed someone to be a certain way for me to open my heart.
🖤 Where I needed someone to prove to me they were trustable BEFORE I radiated my natural inclination to love them.
Through a series of initiations this last year, I’ve come to realize that on that day, amongst my dearest friends and trusted coach, in a beautiful land by the water, my soul intervened with this channeled message.
My higher self just could not watch me waste any more time getting distracted by how much money to spend on FB ads, or which Myers Briggs personality type to hire for my assistant… not to say that none of this is important…
However, my higher self was rolling up her sleeves and was like “Alright, let’s cut to the chase. Let’s strip you of all this unnecessary BS. Why are you here? You are here to be a vessel of unconditional love. How are you going to make that shit happen?”
And so I dove in.
And I want to invite you to dive in.
Take some time to explore…
To explore where all the places that you still love conditionally are…
Where are all the places where you could get so much more joy and ecstasy and aliveness out of opening your heart?
Sure, you’ll also get grief, pain, heartache, and sadness but the moment we stop letting fear stop us from opening our heart…
The moment we stop letting the fear of heartbreak stop us from loving…
That’s when we can start to truly become a vessel of unconditional love.
(Want to explore this together? We will be doing this in circle for 11 weeks in Embodied Union.)
And the reason it’s so important to become a vessel of unconditional love is because all the pain and suffering you see in the world is a result of conditional love.
Think about it.
The programming of working until midnight…
The addiction to numbing out all our feelings…
The challenges in your partnership or your dating life…
Because on some level, we experience and then we replicate: “I will only give you love if you give me this.”
As kids, we learn before we are able to bathe or feed or shelter ourselves, that we require the love and attention of an adult caregiver to survive.
So when you’re a baby:
Love literally equals survival.
And no love literally equals death.
We learn that love is transactional.
That love is an exchange.
That love is conditional.
So over time, we begin to model what we learned as babies. “I give you this so you give me that.“
But that’s not truly what divine love is. Love wants nothing from anyone. Love just wants to express, to emote, to exist. Love wants to pulsate and move. Love just wants to be. Free. With no conditions.
Continuing to dole out conditional love means you are stuck in a child’s reality.
Continuing to say I love you ONLY if you act this way, look this way, become this way for me
Or
Continuing to use someone else’s unconscious fear of death/losing love to hold their heart hostage is a child’s way of operating.
This is codependent.
This is transactional.
This is the world view of a child.
And as long as you walk around with that version of love as your compass, you can never step into being a Queen. And that means you will definitely not attract your King.
It’s time for all of us to work harder on peeling away EVERYTHING that is still stopping us from loving unconditionally.
We will do that together in Embodied Union, the group I’m bringing together right now.
We begin May 22.
And this is for a select 11 woman ONLY.
** If you sign up in the next 4 days (until Sunday midnight PST), you will also receive a bonus 1-hour coaching call with me! ** (valued at $299)
I would love to support you in magnetizing your King or evoking the King out of your current partner.